Italy Hates "Jersey Shore": Here Are 6 Ways MTV Can Ease The Tension

Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and the rest of the cast of "Jersey Shore" haven't even arrived in their would-be motherland Italy yet -- but the country is already sick of them.

A trailer for the show posted on the MTV Italia website elicited enraged comments from viewers, one of whom even surmised that perhaps "Bin Laden had a point."

Well, what country would want to be aligned with those trapezoidal hairstyles?

The overtanned-fish-out-of-water factor certainly wasn't lost on MTV when they chose Italy as the show's season 4 location. They must have been counting on Italians having a dubious reaction to their self-appointed American representatives.

But while the culture clash will undoubtedly yield some priceless footage, the show's producers should consider some measures to keep the tone zany -- instead of ugly.

This one should be obvious: stop saying "guido."

It's easy to forget that before "Jersey Shore" drunkenly splashed its way into our consciousness, this was considered a slur, i.e. something you're not supposed to say. Though the word is more often used to refer to Italian-Americans than Italians, it's probably not a good idea for Sammi to walk into a cafe in Capri and announce that she's trolling for hot guidos.

Cover up. Seriously.

No, they're not going to a culturally conservative country -- but outfits like this probably aren't the best way to earn goodwill anywhere.

As publicity goes, limit each cast member to one dumb soundbyte -- at least until shooting is over.

"I honestly can't wait to get there and see the place! For some reason, I want to go on a gondola ride!" That's Deena Cortes on her impending trip abroad. We get it: these kids say ditzy stuff. But if Italians are up in arms after seeing a mere clip of the show, a slew of idiot-minded press will seal their negative perceptions of the cast.

Maybe skip the job this time around.

The Shore Store in Seaside Heights, NJ is one thing -- Italy's establishments are quite another. We're sure plenty of local businesses could use the exposure. But it might not be worth the hit their customer service will take. Bilingual business interactions between cast members and patrons will end well for no one. And what could the cast do with that found time?

Change GTL to GHL.

That's "gym, history, laundry." Yeah, it may come off like a total farce, but producers should of course make sure the cast sees some landmarks and absorbs some culture -- if they love Italy as much as they say they do, they won't mind taking time out from drinking to do it. And we picked "T" to fall out because the fake bake won't play as well overseas.

Choose their neighborhood wisely.

The boardwalk-overlooking location of the cast's house in Seaside Heights made sense -- they're just the craziest people in a sea of booze-and-funnel-cake-fueled craziness. But assuming there is no true Italian equivalent to the booze-soaked shore town, Snooki and Co. will probably be living in a city. That's fine -- as long as producers don't plop their loudmouthed gems down in a district where residents are likely to call the police every night. Where they put their cast will be the biggest indicator of how much respect the show's producers have for the area they're visiting.

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